waiting

i know this is a horrible thought, but it's been running through my mind for a while now. i can't help but wonder if life would be better for everyone if my parents just got divorced. in fact, i find myself wanting it to happen more and more often. maybe that way there'd finally be peace in this house. every single day is just filled with yelling, screaming, throwing of objects, and hate. and for some reason, all of it comes back to me. whether it be that i somehow caused the fight between my parents or my mom just using me as an excuse to get her anger out. i'm so sick of getting yelled at and verbally abused because of something i know i didn't do. even now i'm listening to my mom continue to lash out at my dad, prolonging all this stupid tension. i can guarantee she's gonna barge into my room any minute and scream at me for some ridiculous illegitimate reason. is it bad that i dread coming home from school everyday knowing that another verbal war will ensue? my heart has grown cold towards them. the only thing on their minds is how often they can point out each others' mistakes along with mine.

i can't wait to graduate and finally get the fuck out of here. then they'll just be each others' problem.