i'm not your little 6 year old anymore

i'm getting sick of you, mom. you need to stop checking the phone bill for every single number i call or calls me and how many times and how long conversations occur. you need to STOP CALLING MY FRIENDS. it's harrassment, and i don't know what fucking makes you think it's ok to always bug my friends about my wherabouts. checking every single transaction i make on my card doesn't help either. i hate how you ALWAYS talk about not being able to trust me, when you go behind my back and pull shit like this all the time. yeah, i have no reason to make you want to trust me when you won't no matter what.

i lie because if i tell you the truth, there is no way you would ever let me out of the house. i am not some frail little girl who needs constant protection. i'll go to you when i need help. just let me live my life and learn from my own mistakes.

i can't wait to move out of this house and separate everything from you.

my mind at 2 in the morning

so i really hate how all my rebellious actions catch up to me somehow. and my mom is fucking sherlock holmes because she seems to figure EVERYTHING out. i need to figure out a way to get sneakier. maybe get an invisibilty cloak. or ask harry how to make my mom forget things.

that public service announcement on tv where hilary duff comes out of nowhere in a boutique and yells, "you shouldn't say that!" when a couple of chicks refer to an ugly top as "gay" makes me LOL so fucking hard. it's so random and weird, and it makes me wonder who smoked what in order to come up with an ad like that.

i also enjoy that house reruns are on tv at 2 in the morning. it fills that "i'm awake, can't sleep, and don't know what to do" void i often get at this time of night. and who can't get lost in the baby blues of hugh laurie? and that cane is boss. B-O-S-S. if you're wondering, yes, i am talking about random nothings in order to pass time between commercials. and i'm waiting for kevin to finish being naked and come back to talk to me ;].

lol my mom definitely hates the fact that i'm a complete night owl. she just walked over to where i'm sitting and said, "you live life completely backwards. go to bed!" learn to accept it, mother. this is how i'm gonna be doing things for a long ass time. and i know she's stalking me, so i'm gonna do whatever i want anyway.

can school start back up already? it gets tiring just sitting around at home, not having solid plans all the time, and playing the waiting game. and at least when i'm at school i can get fucked up to shit and not have to worry about sobering up. is that horrible? i thought so.

I MISS COURTNEY ZUMWALT. get better soon so we can finally hang!

Zoom zoom zoom gone.

new year's resolutions

- get back in shape
- try harder in school
- find a job
- make him happy
- make 2010 memorable